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Tax Cuts for Job Creators

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I’d like to propose a new wrinkle to the tax code: No income taxes at all on those who make more than $1 Million per year – as long as they spend money on a new home, a new luxury car, yacht, private jet, club memberships, or lavish vacations*

Clearly, all of the above activities create jobs for lesser people and laborers. Someone has to maintain those cars. Someone has to clean their hotel rooms. Someone has to cook their meals. Don’t even get me started with all of the jobs created when a new luxury home is built. The possibilities are endless – home builders, designers, landscapers, component builders, and on down the line.

Think of the boon to the economy. Why do we punish these American heroes as well as the lower class workers? Truly this tax plan is a win-win.

Please write your legislators, leaders and the media to promote and support this plan.

God Bless America!

*monetary details of this plan to be determined

The Greed of the Poor

Have you noticed how greedy poor people are? Always with a hand out. “Gimme, gimme, gimme,” they always say.

These laggards have no shame. They sit there waiting for the bloated benevolent government to send them checks. Do they work for these checks? No, they expect the rest of us to do all the work while they sit back and relax.

These mendicants don’t even want to pay for their own groceries. They expect the rest of us to funnel our tax dollars into their wallets. And like a bunch of suckers, we keep working our tails off just to pay our taxes to support the deadbeats. And what if we refuse to pay our taxes to support these lazy, shiftless spongers? We go to jail!

According to my local newspaper, the average freeloader can make $100-200 a day panhandling. Do you think these cadgers are paying taxes on their ill-gotten gains? Think again! If Al Capone went to prison for tax evasion, why do we let these slugabeds get away with it?

Of course the liberals are to blame for this malingerer culture. Liberals believe that if they keep robbing from the rich and giving to the loafers, the leeches will continue to vote Democrat. And why wouldn’t they?

People like to grandstand and brag about how wonderful they are for volunteering at soup kitchens. Why aren’t the indigent and homeless volunteering and working there? These sluggards are so arrogant that they demand to be served hand and foot by the taxpayer as if they are royalty. Who do they think they are? The Queen of England?

Volunteering at a soup kitchen does no good except one – making the volunteer feel stately. Otherwise it simply enables the paupers to continue their parasitic lifestyle.

So the next time one of these leeches asks you to fork over your hard-earned money, tell that moocher that you’re sick and tired of his or her greed!

Privatize National Endowment For The Arts

Actors, directors, writers, and musicians consider themselves artists. While most people in these professions will never be successful, those who do succeed often make large sums of money. Millions of dollars. Far more than the average taxpayer.

Currently the poor taxpayer supports arts through the National Endowment for the Arts – even if they find the art to be disgusting and offensive. Instead, it’s time for the successful artists to give back to their unsuccessful brethren artists. In my opinion, most of the “starving artists” aren’t very good and will never succeed on their own. They need a rich benefactor to support them. But not the hardworking Americans who struggle to support their own family while paying taxes through the nose.

Surely people like Oprah Winfrey, George Clooney, Quincy Jones and Jerry Seinfeld could afford to reach into their pockets – instead of yours and mine. If all of the rich artists donated a substantial amount, they could endow the arts themselves. It would take the burden off of ma and pa middle-class American.

So write your representatives, write the presidential candidates, and write your favorite successful artists. Tell them to stop taking your hard earned money to pay for this disgrace.

Let’s take the burden off of the American taxpayer and place it right where it belongs – the talented, wealthy artists that have profited handsomely from the arts.

Eliminate the US Postal Service

There was a time when The US Postal Service was a vital and wonderful service. That timeĀ is gone.

Personally, I only get two kinds of mail: junk mail and bills. It wouldn’t bother me a bit if I only received one delivery a week, or even less. FedEx and UPS could surely handle such a schedule. I really don’t need the bills to arrive by mail – I pay them online anyway. I could always print them out if I needed a hard copy, although I don’t know why I would need a paper copy.

Don’t even get me started on junk mail. It goes straight to the trash. If I really want a coupon, I can look online. Surely it would save businesses money if they could end this cycle of junk mail to landfill. Even the most liberal of tree huggers would celebrate the conserving of paper.

It seems like even the poorest folks rural have a smart phone nowadays. Surely we could eliminate the postal service and let for-profit companies and the beloved Internet replace them seamlessly.